God Loves Women

A blog sharing my love of God, the love He has for women and my frustration that the Church often doesn't realise this

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Feelings of Me

Posted by God Loves Women on January 11, 2012 at 3:45 PM

February 2005


Sometimes I wonder why I’m here

Why I don’t just leave or die or just be

But then I realise it’s ‘cause I’m yours

You wouldn’t have it another way

 

You’re not really mine

Though you aim to please

You don’t really care

But you know you do

 

I cant make sense of myself

Don’t worry,

But you won’t

 

You care about me

But not about them

Those feelings that make me the person I am

And if I could, I’d move on

But that won’t ever be

 

Because you’re not really mine

Though you aim to please

You don’t really care but you know I do

 

You f*ck me and with me

And love me and make it

But do you care

I mean really care?

 

Of course you do, and don’t

When it’s too much

To bother with and stay waking for

You’d rather be in slumbers

So sweet and delightful

Than being a caring person of love

 

I know you don’t mean it

And that’s past your capabilities

But it’d be great if you’d think

For more than one moment

About things like my feelings

And the reason for those

 

The pain, it hurts me

Sometimes and always

Whenever you F*ck me or with me or near me

Not that you do that

You can’t anymore

The guilt is too much

It’s not my pain or my scars

 

‘Oh the scars!’ you say

What are they?

You know what I mean

My feelings and needings

And wantings and hurts

 

But they don’t matter the time has gone by

And no more confusings

And hurtings and pain

Because you are asleep now

And I am alone……………..

 

 

…….Good morning my love

Good morning my dear

Won’t this be a nice day

And a nice year

 

We’ll have so much fun and laughter, no needs

And those things are forgotten

What things, in deed

Nothing

Just love and niceness and us

 

 

Categories: Poems, Living in an abusive relationship

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